A Family Moment

It was Valentine's Day weekend and a daughter and her husband and Ed and I were driving to meet another daughter at Sweetie Pie's rib eye steakhouse in Decatur, Texas. My daughter, nameless at her request, said to her husband: "You mentioned to Mamma (her grandmother) to notice Tina's new haircut. I wonder if she remembered to notice."

"No, I didn't say that," he answered, "you said it."

"No, I didn't say it. You said it."

"No, I didn't say it.

"Well, someone said it," my daughter said.

My husband then said, "I said it."

"You said it?" She queried.

By this time, I was laughing because it was turning into a "Who's on first" moment.

"Well, if we can't decide who said it, I'll say I said it," I said.

Somehow my daughter didn't see the humor, but later when she asked Tina if Mamma had noticed her new haircut, she could hardly tell the story for laughing. All three of us laughed until we cried. Our husbands question our sanity sometimes.

Did Mamma notice? Yes, she did.

My Heart Hurts

She's beautiful and talented and articulate, a woman, a politician, a Jew, a Democrat. She was in the crosshairs, a target all right. She's barely alive; six people are dead. I'm angry and I'm disgusted and I'm also saddened and so disappointed with the radical politics in this country. You could see it coming. The hateful radio and TV talk shows, the black humor, the politicians spouting off outright lies to either obtain or maintain their offices. Of course, the political pundits are pointing fingers every way but their way. No, they're not to blame, they say.

Some say this nation needs a soul-searching. Yes, on one hand we call ourselves a Christian nation and on the other, we sling around slanderous remarks about our fellow citizens and laugh about it. Six dead and 14 injured. Why does it take a horrific tragedy to make us think. My heart hurts.

I'm Trying, Lord!

It's a new year. A time to think about what I want to accomplish this year. Surely I can come up with more than just changing the date of my last year's resolutions from 2010 to 2011. And, I have to ask myself several questions: Why are last year's goals still this year's goals? Did I have too many? Was I unrealistic? Am I setting myself up to fail again this year?

I'm trying to come up with a workable schedule for my 2011 goals, but it seems impossible to fit everything in. I remember thinking longingly about all the extra time I would have to do all I wanted when I retired, but I seem busier than ever. Not to mention the time I need to rest. Can you believe it? Scheduling in time to rest? But that's reality for me now.

First on my priorities, to be what some call "in the Word." Not sure exactly what that means, but I'm reading 1 Peter this morning: "Therefore prepare your minds for action; discipline yourselves; set all your hope on the grace that Jesus Christ will bring you when he is revealed." I'm trying, Lord. I'm trying. Thank the Lord for his grace!

Christmas 2010

It's the day after Christmas. ER is a place of strange scenes and sounds. As I sit with my dozing 92-year-old mother, a machine whirs and beeps out her vitals across its screen. A large lamp hangs over her head amid a tangle of wires and cords. Someone has ripped open the sleeve of her gown to reveal a bloody elbow. She's on oxygen. Nurses, aides, EMTS joke with each other at the desk across from her room. A grandmother weeps in the hall as a child screams in a couple of rooms down. It would be surreal if I hadn't already been here many times before.

Mother has fallen again and been rushed by ambulance to hospital emergency . She believes she can get up by herself, but when she tries she falls. This time she has a nasty bruise with some swelling on the back of her head and a scraped elbow. Her head hurts and her temperature is up a few degrees. They finally tell me she will be admitted overnight for observation. Their patient rooms are full. She will be moved to a room when one is open.

Though I'm sitting in a cold hospital emergency room away from visiting with my children and grandchildren on this holiday weekend, I'm not complaining. A friend of mine lost her mother, yesterday, on Christmas Day. As I watch my mother's dear face, I'm thankful.

Wouldn't it be great if Christmas could be a time out from suffering, death and tears? How wonderful it would be if the peace, joy and hope Christmas pictures could be a reality around the world on Christmas Day every year. No, it's not going to happen, but Christmas reminds us that time is sure to come.

A Gift From God

Sometimes I decide to give a day to God. No, not always Sunday, it can be some other day--a day when I put aside my desires, concerns and personal pleasures and focus on God. I might not eat on that day. I might not watch television or play video games or check Facebook over and over to see what my friends are up to. I don't do laundry or clean house or cook. It's a day to worship, praise, meditate on him. This day is a gift to God.

Now, I have to admit most of the time I have ulterior motives. I'm needing inspiration for an article or a presentation or I need a solution to one of those concerns I'm supposed to have put aside. I'm a natural born worrier.

God is not fooled, of course. He knows my human nature, and, in spite of me, appreciates my attempts to give him a gift. Kind of like children when they bring a somewhat straggly, slightly wilted wild flower to you as a gift. You treat that flower like a treasure, put it in a vase and give your child a big hug. You might give your child a cookie too.

I think that human love response to a child comes from God. Every time I try to give God a day, it turns out he gives me a day instead. On that day with God, my concerns are turned to joys and my stresses are relieved. I'm rested, calmed, and the worrier is now rejoicing because God lets her know she is not totally responsible for solving either her problems or the cares of the world. He reminds her that he knows what's going on and he is still in control. Thank you, Lord.

No Ham, Please

Several years ago when I was volunteering on Monday mornings at the Home Hospice office, at lunch I would grab a sandwich at Subway. Subway has sandwich specials, and Monday is its turkey and ham day. I don't like ham, so every Monday I asked the young person working behind the see-through counter to give me the special but without the ham. They would not comply. In all that time, only once or maybe twice would they do as I asked. So, each time after I paid, on the way out I would unwrap the sandwich, remove the ham and toss it into their trash can.

Last Monday, I happened to be in town so I stopped by Subway. Again, I asked the young man behind the counter if he could leave off the ham on my turkey sandwich. Cheese, yes, ham, no. He shook his head. "I can put it on the side," he said. "OK," I replied. He slipped the ham into one of their envelope-type sacks, wrapped my sandwich and put both in a plastic bag. I paid him and dropped the ham into the trash can on my way out the door.

At Subway it seems rules are rules. When those kids behind the counter are told no alternatives, that's what administration means. When a customer wants something left off their specials, that's money in corporate pockets, I would think, but no. What a waste. I couldn't help thinking about how this affects their young employees. I hope they see through this type of illogic legalism. I hope it encourages them to think for themselves. I hope it's for the better.

A Wanna-Be

Are you a wanna-be? I am. I wanna be fluent in Spanish. I wanna be a good golfer. I wanna be 10 pounds lighter. I wanna memorize scripture. I wanna be a better artist. I remember telling a Jewish professor I would like to learn biblical Hebrew. She answered: "A lot of people want to know Hebrew." I got the message.
Learning another language, losing weight, memorizing scripture, driving golf balls, painting in oils, all take time, discipline and hard work. The apostle Paul even described the Christian life as running a race, not just slowly jogging along but running to win. 1 Corinthians 9:24–10:1 (NIV). Salvation is a gift, but according to Paul, a Christian should live a disciplined life, led by the spirit, not the flesh. The Christian life is not a fearful life, but a life full of interesting challenges.
My problem is prioritizing my challenges. I have too many wannas. Do you have this problem? The writing on my tombstone could read, "She ran out of time." Some years ago now I wrote down everything I considered important to me. Just took out a piece of paper and started writing. Then I prioritized what I had listed according to importance and figured out how much time I spent on the top ten. It's an eye-opening process. I think it's time to do it again.
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